In My House: Funny Things

I got out, then boyfriend hopped in the shower. First thing he does is complain and adjust the water temperature.

Oh my god its sooo hot!

No its not! (purple is me)

Yes it is I don't see how your skin isn't melted off! (this if bf)

That's like, impossible.

Your impossible,

Impossibly sexy!

(in my head thinking: omg that is the lamest thing i've ever heard! so dumb its funny! actually really funny! wow so lame!)

I dry off, laugh, roll my eyes and think how weird he is for not liking his water temp hot like a sauna. Then laugh some more because he really said impossibly sexy.

Moving on to the grossest thing ever. I had just gotten home from work, my dog was ell excited to see me, he rolled on his back, you know so his stomach and paws are up in the air. I reach down to pet him and the next thing I know, my forearm and palm is covered in pee! Dog pee. Sick! WTF! Theres pee on my hand! I couldn't get to the sink fast enough. He was suuper excited to see me, obvi! But it was really gross did I say that already? One day sure I might get peed on, maybe as a Mom to a little boy you know. But that is one day! Not now! So this was unnecessary! Uncalled for! SOOOO GROSS!!

I shorthand alot of my speech, you know, actually pronouncing OMG like 0-m-g. Thats what the cool people do right? Right. Someone needs to tell bf:

Wow they are losing bad. (talking bout some basketball game)

I know babe WTF. (my wonderful response to the score I don't care about )

He gave me a puzzled look for a second and I knew right away why.

I was like, "did you just have to think what that meant right now?"

And he was all, "haha yea kinda I was thinking what the f is she talking about, oh yea, wtf!"

It was funny, maybe you had to have been there! But since you werent, hence the post ha!

P.s. I typed in "pee" on Google Images, thinking I might find a picture to go with the post. Wrong. Bad idea. I'm grossed out now.